Monday, November 7, 2011

Happy Halloween!

There are few who'd deny, at what I do I am the best,
For my talents are renowned far and wide,
When it comes to surprises in the moonlit night,
I excel without ever even trying.
With the slightest little effort of my ghostlike charms
I have seen grown men give out a shriek,
With the wave of my hand and a well placed moan
I have swept the very bravest off their feet!
~Jack, the Pumpkin King

One of the only non-scary Halloween costumes I've ever had, made from scratch! In High school. I made all of those beads from white flour dough baked in the oven and painted. It weighed a tonne! I didn't win this costume contest because I refused to walk like an Egyptian. I was too shy. (Which is pretty funny, considering!)

Yes, I know I'm a week late, but that's just the way these two months have been.

Halloween is by far my favourite holiday, and since I don't usually spend Halloween in Canada, I decided that I would go all out celebrating my favourite holiday with style. Usually, I am a witch year after year, which is pretty boring for a creative type like me, I know. However, I only seem to have fun when I'm really really unrecognizably ugly. And this year, I felt like I wanted to switch things up and be some kind of nameless zombie.

My first attempt at being a ghoul with big help from my sis, the queen of ghouls. Together we transformed my friend Kevin from a Blues Brother (Lame!) to the beauty he is here. Kevin recently admitted hehad the best time being scary. (He was Captain Kirk this year. I tried to talk him into dead Captain Kirk, but he didn't go for it.)

So I eschewed the homework and went to Value Village sometime in Early October. I don't know Vancouver very well, but I know there is a Value Village out on infamous East Hastings. So off I went, trucking from ritzy Kits to Value Village East Hastings. The staff were in costumes, the customers too tired of waiting for dressing rooms donned costumes over their clothes. I was in search of a cheap white nightie that I could rip up and roll in the dirt. But sadly, there were none to be had.

My sister Rene cutting my head off many years ago! But don't worry, I'm immortal. It's hard to kill me.

I started looking at old crappy stained wedding dresses, but all the dresses were too expensive for my tastes or strapless, and since I would be going to high school in this, I figured I'd better cover the boobage up. I did find a hot pink merangue dress though, which was so hideous I decided I could do something with it, but it wasn't really what I wanted. But the price was right and I didn't have time to keep looking.

Considering this was Halloween in Taiwan, I think we pulled together some great Costumes. Rene was te Queen of death with her Skull crown. We made kids cry! And we loved it! (One of the secretaries kept my black tooth goo for me and gave it to me a few days after Halloween becuase she was afraid would use it all up on Halloween, hence the clean teeth here. I still don't understand her logic of not giving it to me on Halloween!)

As I stood in line, I saw a man with stringy long hair wearing a big frilly wedding dress over his clothes. He was tall and skinny and the dress actually fit him quite well. What a costume! He looked absolutely ridiculous in it. He saw me admiring the dress so I gave him a thumbs up.

"I totally want your dress!" I called over the tills at him.

"Really?" He shouted back. "I found it in the alley in a box. I'm trying to trade it in for some warm clothes over the winter."

The UBC costume contest labelled me, Old Zombie crow bride. I don't like the bride bit, I don't think it looks like a wedding dress anymore. I took it in myself with some real Sally Nightmare before Christmas stitches!

Before I knew it, I was in negotiations over this dress. The guy was happy to sell it to me if I bought him some warm clothes. Our deal was almost made until the Value VIllage people stepped in. They wanted the dress. It had beautiful beading and lace sleeves. "This one won't go for cheap," The employee told me as she unzipped the dress down the homeless man's back.
I met this guy on the bus! He says he knit the helmet and beard himself.
Man after my own heart!

But honestly, the dress stank, and was ripped up one of the seams, and was missing a few beads. So for shits and giggles, I asked her to ask what the dress would cost as is. Ten minutes later, I'd bought my first and only wedding dress for 40 bucks with tax. Before I left the store, I found the homeless man searching through the coat section.

Japanese girls in the boat bathroom! We had good times.

"I just paid forty bucks for your dress," I told him. "Make sure you get your money's worth!"

I took the dress home, threw it in the wash machine and once it was clean, I dirtied it up again. By the way, Coffee grounds stain up a dress to make it look dirty quite nicely! Though you need to keep the dress out of your bedroom for the first week if you have any plans to sleep.
The whole Enchilada!

I wore this dress once to my practicum high school, once to a boat cruise with the language school I worked at this summer, and again to UBC where I tied for first place in the Education department's Halloween Costume contest! (I won a twenty dollar gift card! Woo hoo! Thanks, ESA!) When it was time to put the dress away, I was kind of sad not to have a reason to wear it again till next Halloween. (Or unless I get married this year! I've already got a dress!)

I'm Jack! The Pumpkin King! And I just can't wait until next Halloween,
I've got some new ideas that will really make them SCREAM!

And I carved probably one of the scariest pumpkins I've ever made. So sad to see them rot over the next few days. My Jack-o-lantern was so scary my roommate said he had to turn the face away while he ate dinner. Yes! Success.

One of my favourite pictures! Mainly because my friend here has no eyes.

I'm not sure where I'll be next Halloween. But you can be sure that if I am still in Canada, the old Zombie with the crow will be out haunting the streets of some town, this time next year.

And I just can't wait until next Halloween,
Cause I've got some new ideas that will really make them SCREAM!
Happy Halloween!